Wayne’s World March 2016

casey confWayne’s World


Wayne Casey

The views expressed in this article are not the views of the paper, the NTA or NPHA

Carrying on from last month

As I stated last month, I now consider myself a spectator in all things licensed, its far easier on the old heart to be detached and unemotional.

The past couple of articles have concentrated, quite fairly, on the general idiocy of those nice folks who license us and pass laws.

However, in fairness and we must face facts, some of you are cannon fodder – because some of you appear to be a couple of sandwiches short of a picnic.

As ever, I do actually have proof, this just is not a simply wild accusation just put in this column for the outrage, although I would contend, I am merely passing an opinion, the others are causing the actual outrage.

The Bolton news provided a degree of corroboration to my stunning allegation with a story about a private-hire driver who was guilty of not allowing a blind man into his car because he had a guide dog.

Exactly what kind of depraved, stupid and ignorant human would refuse to carry a blind person with their guide dog when is it illegal to refuse, but on every level it is morally unjustifiable.

This kind of a person should be set in stocks at the town hall for members of the public to throw rotten fruit at, I mean, if I was to suggest kneecapping this man would be fair, I don’t think many would disagree.

The driver actually claimed in court “he did not know it was a guide dog, and that he would not have refused”.

I guess the dog was wearing a fluorescent jacket as some type of fashion statement.

The poor chap attached to the dog needing assistance did so because he thought it would be a good idea to walk around with his eyes closed.

If this didn’t strike the driver as a bit odd it must mean the driver is mentally challenged, as we must be, if we are to believe his ‘cock and bull’ version of events, which obviously, nobody, not even the magistrates believed.

I mean, how horrible must this human being actually be? Sight is one of the greatest gifts we have, we can see a glorious landscape, a sunset, the very beauty of life, the passenger was robbed of this, and instead of very human sympathy, the driver saw a dog, a dog that was trained to give the poor blind person a degree of independence.

How low can a person get?

The operator told the driver that he must accept the job, calling him into the office to fire him after the refusal, indeed the dispatcher went to court and confirmed this.

The next lunatic that deserves to be dragged along a cobbled road for countless miles by a team of horses is the chap in Derbyshire who put a sign in his taxi prohibiting people to speak in any language other than English.

In terms to sheer stupidity, this one takes the biscuit, because the chap appears to believe he’s done nothing wrong, presumably this is like the chap from Bolton mentioned above who similarly believed he’d done nothing wrong either.

With everyone doing nothing wrong, but being found guilty, this speaks volumes about the lack of justice within the British judicial system, little wonder David Icke describes the judiciary as reptilians.

This kind of idiocy is beyond my own ken, I mean he is from Derbyshire for heaven’s sake, a place where English is used as a second language and the number of digits attached to the hands is normally more than the usual five.

For one, the cabbie presumes people can read and write in English, and judging the hate mail I receive from some of you, I can tell you this simply isn’t the case.

I noticed with a certain degree of alarm that a cyclist managed to obtain exclusive footage of a now former Addison Lee minicab driver vigorously masturbating at a set of traffic lights whilst looking at a pornographic publication.

Cyclist and road safety campaigner Lewis Dediare rumbled the minicab driver.

Lewis also works as a telecoms supervisor, presumably road safety campaigning just isn’t bringing in as much cash these days as it used to.

Lewis was quoted as saying, “As I was cycling towards him I noticed him driving into the cyclists box’. An unfortunate choice of expression given what he found at the traffic lights.

Lewis went on to say ‘What a filthy person. It scares me to think that he could be picking women up after looking at pornography. He is a minicab driver, he could be carrying my sister.’

I have news for Lewis, who has perhaps led a sheltered life; this is the type of person licensed across the UK.

When people raise questions they’re very often described as luddites or racists who are getting in the way of technology. The good news is (well for me anyway as folk like this will fill my articles), it is going to get worse and there is nothing anyone can or will do about it.

Another person who deserves beaten about the head with a cricket bat is Naseer Taj who was a cab driver in Bedford. He was planning to leave his heavily pregnant wife and children to join those nut-jobs in the Middle East whose favourite hobby appears to be cutting folks heads off and dreaming up new ways to ritually murder people.

All in the name of god obviously, because God is like that, especially to those who don’t believe in him, or even those that do believe in him, but wear a different kind of hat.

No doubt, this chap is as fit and proper as everyone else I’ve mentioned thus far in my column. I expect Lewis will be appalled as me about Naseer, filled with thoughts of murdering people, all in the name of his god, filling me with as much angst as the masturbating marvel he filmed.

I wish I could end there, but sadly, I cannot, we have licensed drivers across the country (or formerly licensed drivers) who are currently on remand, convicted or on the run in the Indian sub continent for CSE.

Worryingly, these are just the ones that have been caught, imagine for one moment if it was just the tip of the iceberg.

Imagine for one moment if a situation arose where a driver could legally work many miles away from his area of license, anonymously, imagine the havoc that may bring?

I fail to mention the reports of licensed drivers defecating in the gardens of Stanwell near Heathrow. I don’t know about you, but if I spotted a minicab driver pooing near my dahlias I’d be rather upset, I may even rub the offenders nose in it, I mean its bad enough with cats.

I have been involved in the cab trade my entire life, from my position as a spectator, I have to say the standard of person being licensed now is at a rather low ebb.

This is despite the many courses for disability awareness, BTEC, NVQ, group two medicals, DBS checks and new CSE courses being rolled out across the country.

I am not sure if the BTEC or NVQ has a pooing on a person’s lawn section, perhaps they should consider it.

As you would expect, nobody is bothered, save for those with lawn issues. The people able to make changes do not overall use taxis or PHV’s, so why would they be troubled?

Greater regulation is generally perceived as greater restriction, the market must be free. So this is why some councils are lowering the entry criteria, they know applicants will go elsewhere with their cash, and return because of other councils turning blind ones.

We deal with the kind of people who pay the law commission to look at taxi and PH licensing then shove the report, a report that cost nearly half a million quid, into row z.

Can you blame them? The only people being raped and molested are on the whole working class people, and they certainly aren’t bothered about them.

I realise Mr Blair was a bit lame, but please tell me why working class people vote Tory? You are not a millionaire, so all they want from you is your vote they certainly don’t want you for your table manners or your aroma.

Maybe this is my point, and maybe the sooner most of you begin to realise that nobody is bothered about you or our profession the sooner you will begin to relax and enjoy life a little more.

We are nothing more than a necessary inconvenience to authorities, the contempt for us is shown by the people to whom they grant licenses. Something that has to be licensed, but nothing more than a box ticking exercise.

In what other profession would someone who cannot speak, read or write in English be given a job, when throughout the day they are expected to deal with the public?

Ordinarily, if someone was unable speak English, they wouldn’t be hired to work on the checkout at Tesco or to work reception at a hotel. In the cab trade, they are given a driver’s seat.

When authorities see the foolishness of doing this, they proceed to insult everyone they have already licensed by insisting everyone, even those who can easily converse in the mother tongue and correspond in English, are made to sit down on the same insulting courses. Just to rub more salt into the wound, in some cases drivers are made to pay.

Of course, I am being harsh here.

For one moment lets ignore those who can’t drive properly, those who like rape, those who like under age sex with children, masturbating at traffic lights, defecating on lawns and everything else.

Its councillors that employ licensing officers and develop policy, officers act under their direction. You elect councillors; it is therefore your fault for electing lackadaisical, uninformed, naïve and uncaring people to make decisions and policy on your behalf.

It would appear a rumour is circulating like Chinese whispers over the internet blaming links between the Prime Minister and that damn apps Rachel Whetstone, Senior Vice-President of Policy and Communications.

I think the conspiracy buffs need to get over themselves. I realise the ‘X files’ is back on the television, but really?

You would believe that if that damn app was so perceptive with the local government miscellaneous provisions act 1976, they’d have been pushing for changes in the law.

Indeed, you would have expected them to write to the Law Commission when major changes were being considered.

Why would that damn app company not write to the law commission and say hey, these cross border rules are stupid? Would it be ignorance? stupidity? relevance? Do we find out at long last that a billion dollar company just simply forgot to write to a body that was intending to change the rules it works under?

Indeed, prior to the deregulation act, one private hire lobby group answered the following question from the DfT as follows;

The first proposal is to allow PHV operators licensed in England (outside London) and Wales to sub-contract bookings to an operator licensed in a different district.

The PHRC not only agrees this proposal would reduce a burden / remove an inherently unfair geographic restraint of trade, but that it is a very small legislative change that will transform the way the private hire trade operates and create employment, improve responsiveness to customer bookings and reduce CO2 vehicle emissions by reducing the distances travelled by PHVs without carrying passengers.

Indeed, in the recent past the following was stated before parliament by another private hire group.

In a modern Britain there should be no ‘invisible borders’ or ‘barriers to free trade’, as protectionism and outdated thinking belongs to yesterday. In London for environmental and safety reasons ‘Licensed Operators’ in Private Hire are not constrained by ‘quotas and artificial operating borders’, etc., and rightly can pick up and drop anywhere with a previously made booking.

Of course, the above was then, now that damn app is taking drivers away from private hire operators.

In addition to the above in London there is strong evidence that Uber PHV Drivers are travelling into the London Licensing Area (Cross Border) and parking vehicles without bookings that are then being ‘virtually hailed’ via the Uber App, which shows their availability and position, so they are acting like a taxi.

Suddenly those ‘invisible borders’ or ‘barriers to free trade’, as protectionism and outdated thinking belongs to yesterday.’ don’t look too bad.

Cynical? You bet your ass.